A Mystery that it is... or is it ???

Today, yet again, after a long time, I felt the urge to write. My Random thoughts, and my random ways of expression...

Mr. X and Ms. Y go on a Date...Romance...Giggle...Enjoy...Have fun...
But have u ever wondered about this – A DATE WITH YOURSELF?
How romantic could that be? You... and Your Solitude... Main and meri Tanhai...

I had a date with myself today. I pampered myself with emotions and emotions and emotions! I treated myself with chocolates and ice-creams and some pleasant memories. Expectedly, I did have some rash times also. And I had to fight with them, tell them “You-bad thoughts, Go away. I don’t want to be upset today”. But they refused to budge... They kept on teasing me again and again... the feelings – some sweet and sugary... some just as harsh and hard!

It’s said, an empty mind is a devil’s mind. Somehow, I choose to disagree. For me, The times I have given to myself remain the most special moments of my life. These are the times when I really look not just in the mirror but in some other world. And see something completely different...

I see...
A reclined flag... at the end... I need to go there and put is upright...
I see where I am presently...
Far off... very far from the flag...
So far that the flag doesn’t appear bigger than a small point.
On the way I see jumbo-sized stones..
Beside them I spot flowers... and a pathway alongside.
Masses of people are walking on it...
Shockingly, the road takes a turn in between...
The folks don’t know where they are going.
They just keep on moving, with no destination.
Reluctantly, I stand alone and watch them go away.
I have to step across those stones, throw them elsewhere...
Regardless of how heavy they may be...
I may get tired and to rejuvenate, I have those flowers...
They emit fragrance...
They tingle the energy inside me...
And I smile :-) :-)

I move on...to the next stone...
A yet bigger one...
But so is the flower...

The walk continues...
That dot far off – the flag- still remains as small as the dot...

I wonder... Will I ever really reach it?
I wonder... Is it actually there?
I wonder... Do I really want to reach it?

And then I say...
I don’t want to reach it... No, I don’t.
I don’t want this journey to end...
I don’t want to stop crossing the stones...
I don’t want to miss the freshness of flowers...
I don’t want to be silent, immobile- like those stones..
I would be like one, if I reach that flag!

I... want to keep moving...

I do....

“Richa... Richaaaa... RICHAAAAAA...”
My friends yell...
And I am zipped back to reality...
This is where I am...
With my friends... my world...
With my family... My everything...
With the people who made me who I am...
I feel blessed... I feel so lucky...
For a moment, I see no stones.
I see only love...
But for a moment...

Only for a moment!

This is what I am like... Weird... and this is what my life is... Weird!!
It remains a mystery... which can’t ever be solved...a never-ending perplex puzzle... We have to just let some things happen... have to let them go... and just be a silent spectator...We sometimes just have to be at peace with ourselves! And that happens, that really happens when you have a date with yourself!

I had one today...

A date... with myself !

EMPTINESS

A sudden change has come
Life seems to have come to a standstill
Abruptly, silence seems everywhere
Emptiness seems to crawl on me..

Unexpectedly I see an image
I am standing..
Shouting, begging, wanting …

I am waiting..
For someone to come..
For something to happen..

But its all the same.
I stand with my arms wide open..
A breeze blows..
It tells me that Girl, you are not alone..i am there..
It reminds me of God..
God is omnipresent..

I start crying out of solitude..
Sometimes silence is golden
Sometimes it kills.

Its killing me now..
Somehow I want somebody to come up to me
I want myself to smile
To watch the wonders of nature
To hear the giggles/shouts of humans..

But I am all alone..

As always..

I make a determination..
I have a sense of realisation…

Of the emptiness rampant in this world..

I want to reach the heights..
I want success..
I want support
I want guidance..

But life teaches me that…
Success never comes easy..
Success needs determination and positive proactive outlook
I have that..
But success sometimes leaves me alone..

It makes me distinct from others..
Yet. It also makes me distant from others..
These others are my beloveds..
I want they be with me..
But no..
In this race of life, I don’t think that..
Anybody else is gonna accompany me..
I have to live for myself..
I cant be OF anyone else..

It’s a rat race..
And I have to surge ahead !
I have no other option !

One thing is sure..
God will always bless me..
He would be there..
To fill up the gaps of emptiness
To cheer me up..
To make me feel better..
To make me a better person altogether..

Life is changing..
My life is completely moving towards a different direction
I see a pathway.. a journey…
I see no destination..

Yet the pathway is very enriching..
It is full of obstacles and awards and prizes and chocolates..
I have to walk through it..
I have to be more professional and selfish..
And keep getting my way !!!!

God, please make me selfish..
Please teach me that the world is not as sweet as it looks to me.

I think it will take sometime
But someday somehow
The realisation would surely dawn on me..
That its only me who can do anything for myself…
That DON’T EXPECT FROM PEOPLE
That DON’T HELP THEM UNNECESSARILY EITHER !

College life rules !!

The college life is a transformation stage – from childhood to Adulthood. In a myriad of uncertainties, the college goers (oh, not literally :p) are a group of people all stressed up. The stress is because of unsure future ..

1.The variety of career options available seemingly exhaust the students. The urge to succeed and to get ahead is felt. The ever-growing familiarity with books and marks..

2.The new point of views, the innovative solutions to repetitive problems already faced, the endless debates on exhaustive topics .. The new generation sets out to rule with its vibrancy and energy.

3.The emotional traumas experienced is yet another thing. Fights with family, the urge of freedom, break-ups with boy/girl friends, ego clashes.. all this lets the student go through a roller-coaster ride right within himself/herself.

4.The hangouts with friends, the socializing part – meeting new people and making new contacts – is interesting ! Parties, Hang-outs, mutual friendships turning direct.. the variety of calls recd. in a day !! On occasions like new year, Valentines day – the rush of SMS and the variety of greeting cards and the scarcity of flowers..the ever-diminishing balances on cell phone , the ever-expanding phone directory.

5.The developing-CV part – getting involved in college activities, participating in contests, winning accolades and awards, Getting Big – Ultimately a good CV shall satiate the need for a good job.

6.The necessity of gadgets- the latest model of cell phone, an IPod.. the hours spent on internet – These gizmo-freaks are cool !

7.The part-time job, the feeling of financial independence or rather a freedom to spend as much as is earned. Lots of wasteful expenditure but still worthwhile.. ;)

8.Hobbies like dancing, singing, playing musical instruments or any other seem a paradise !

And last but not the least ..

9.The weirdest of hairstyles ..with range of different colours… the funkiest of clothes and other accessories…

This is THE best part in one’s life..

For me, this is the ultimate fun..!

College life rules !!

Life - a surprise

Somehow i feel a hard push of emotions within me. i realise life is meant to be lived. living doesnt mean surviving on oxygen. live each moment.

happiness is the ultimate obsession i have. Small tiny-miny things can eb the source of biggest happiness for me.. A small word of genuine praise.. a cute smile from a baby .. a smiple hi from a fren .. an outing with family.. just the company of my frens.. a small walk.. the morning weather, a hearty laugh, a sweet genuine smile.................................

Somehow life never ceases to surprise me with its twists and turns.. taking me to complete highs .. and yes, sometimes even lowest depths.. people say u shud get matured..u shud be diplomatic..u shud know how to get ur things done..u shud be clever n shrewd ! ..

i choose to refuse. for me, being at peace with urself is the most primary thign in life.. and that wudnt come until and unless u have a clean mind. Hail genuineness...

i cannot befriend a person for some benefit which i may get.
i cannot smile when i dont want to.
i cannot talk to somebody i dont like.

i cannot keep up formalities.

i just dont care !

People say, Grow up,RIcha ! realise the kind of world u r living in.. Face the hardships of life.. everything is not as good as it seems.. Life is bad !

somehow, i am reluctant to do so. i dont wanna grow up. i am happy being a kid. My world is better .

When things dont go right
when the whole world seems to come to an end
when you feel like just crying..
but you know you cant.
YOu got to smile.You got to look fine.

When someone very close to u is fighting for life
when you cant think of anything else
when scare takes over optimism..

Doctors become angels of God
Days pass like years
Every second is felt.

Family goes haywire
Everyone seems tensed, irritated,exhausted,depressed,restless..

When such a situation continues to continue..
..for days after days..
When you havent found a single reason to smile in the last few days..

In such a time, fren..

Have faith in God
God wouldnt ever do anything wrong.
He is right up there.Watching.
He would take care of everything.
Nobody else can do anything.
We can just Hope
We can just pray.

In such a time, fren..
If you find things going completely crazy
You feel you cant take it anymore
Take a break - Meet ur buddies.. Go for a walk..Listen to music..

Yeah i know its difficult to feel better in any sort right now
But it'll really feel good..
Just take some time off .. a small amount of time..
..& find a small joke to laugh at..

Her fate lies in His hands..
Let him decide. He'll do the right thing.
Have the faith on him. You got to.

You are a strong man..
Dont surrender.

She would be just ifne.
She would come out of disease..
& would be smiling and laughing..yet again.

Have the faith.

Diwali . My take on that.

Hi friends..

Diwali ka Shubh Avasar aaya
Dher sari khushiyan laya
Ho apke Ghar Ma Lakshmi Aur GaneshJI ka vaas
Yahi Dua karte ahi hum AAJ !

Shubh Deepawali ~

The wishing part over, here goes how i feel about diwali !


The pre-diwali celebration - shopping .. A passion that it is for many of us. All the city malls turn into kumbh melas - more people less space. SOme actually shop, some window-shop and the others -- ahhaaaaa.. NSP !! Finally Dhanteras comes .. Many many many of us go to shop.. buy a silver/gold coin .. Shubh muharat you know ! The burra bazaar area no longer seems burra . Pantaloons or shopper's Stop wouldnt allow you parking facility anymore..the foodjoints be all filled, increasing the business of the murri n poochkawallahs. Victoria turns into a hazardous place - loads of chocolate bombs and allu bombs and other bombs and other weapons reside in there. .

Enough about the pre period. The Day - Badi Diwali ! A day full of energy .. The houses take a new glow, the offices no longer seem that dull, thanks to the diyas,on-off lights,bandanwars, flower ringlets,rangolis and loads others. Amazing Lunch is served coupled with the delicious sweets (which mom makes us eat even if we detest and protest). The pooja takes place and now the bursting of fire crackers ! Dhoom.. Whoosshh.. Woppa.. Alll kinds of wierd sounds, and a marvellous display of lightening.. not to forget, lot of smoke produced too which kills the air-insects !

The Muharat Trading deserves a special mention... The stock Market comes out open in the evening for the only time in 365 (or mebbe +1) days.. 6:15 p.m. when the whole country goes into festive celebration mood, the stock brokers, their families and their clients start trading. The market always takes a new high this time and ends up higher.

And now the day after Diwali ... "Child, wake up. The guests would be coming soon." And listening to this sentence over and over again, i finally concede and leave my bed. Soon The guests start arriving and the hospitality service takes off. I also visit my relatives. Even though i be starving, i cant accept any food at the first offer."nahi nahi, i'm already full.. " i know i am lying, and i lie with such a beautiful smile. "arrey, bas itna sa le lijiye. This wouldnt be dat heavy " pat comes d reply. After moe such further insistances, i take dt tempting dish and gulp it down and gulp it down real fast. *Man, i feel hungry* . Another contrary situation also arises. My stomach ompletely full. infact the food seems to reach d neck level now. And these god-damn relatives make me eat and eat and eat.. Baap re, Thats disastrous, you know. Medical prob ho jayega toh ? !

That's what diwali is for me...

Keep rocking !

Let this festive season take you over, Let there be light all over.
And You, "Follow That LIght ".

Delhi

I was on a trip to Delhi for some days. I am based in Kolkata. There were some major points of difference/similarities which i noticed.. which are worth mentioning.

1. If Kol has 10 big malls, Delhi has 100. May be 200.
2. The traffic system is amazing in Delhi. Flyovers n greenery surround the road, giving very minute scope for garbage to reside in lot many areas.
3. Night life exists over there. A good happening one.
4. Culturally Kolkata seems far superior.. with helping hands whenever u require. If you fall into any kind of trouble, Kolkattans are willing to help. Delhites, No ways !
5. The Delhi Airport is more organised and polished.
6. McDonalds - which is present in every nook and corner of Delhi city.. but which is completely non-existant in Kolkata. *sigh*
7. Delhi exceeds Kolkata in the no. of two-tyre transport vehicles. Delhi also has far lesser no. of cabs.
8. That is because of a general higher standard of living of Delhites. *wink*
9. Kolkata is peaceful. Delhi is not. People are just rushing and running all the time out there.
10. Education-wise Delhi possesses good amount of college and universities.
11. Nevertheless Kolkata still rocks. *Yay..It Does*

Well Guys.. This post is just let you know how i felt. As you all must have guessed, it was my first trip to delhi and i just had to pen down my thoughts ! If you find it boring and dull, Well... Not my problem ! but i wouldn't deny it too ! :) ... Take care, all..